I kind of skipped having a word for September because 1) everything was busy with starting university and looking for a new job, and 2) I didn't really like the word that I had preselected. When I came up with the word list for the rest of this year, my plan was to not change words and to learn what each virtue means to me. But - maybe it was just the timing, I don't know - I decided to skip it. However, my October word, trust, felt like an absolutely wonderful word to focus on. I enjoyed it so much that I felt the need to carry it into November.
For a while now, I've struggled with trust; whether that's trusting myself, trusting others, or simply trusting that things are going to be okay. So looking at trust as my word I sort of thought, alright maybe I'll just skip another month. I didn't really want to go there. But, then I realized I'd be missing the point of this project of mine if I just keep skipping the virtues that I don't want to think about. I'm so glad that I decided to trust that trust would be a good one to look at. The back of the card says:
The Practice of Trust
I maintain my hope.
I do not nag others or try to control them.
I believe there is some good in everything that happens.
I allow trust to heal my fears.
I am confident in my capacity for lifelong learning.
I rely on Divine assistance.
After reading that, I guess you could say I fell in love with trust. It made me realize that I am capable of trusting because almost all the things on the list, I'm already practicing. I'm not sure what I thought trust was supposed to feel like before, but now I understand it better. And, like the back of the card says, "I am thankful for the gift of Trust. It renews my strength".
One thing that I've been trying to work on is having the ability to flow through my life and to continue believing that nothing is good or bad, it just is. Every experience is another chance to learn and grow, and I will trust that as much as I can. So I enjoyed reading about trust, I felt like it showed me that what I want to work towards for myself isn't impossible and that it's called trust.